Killer Fish is a 1978 horror / Jaws rip-off directed by Antonio Marghertiti.
A team of thieves plot to steal priceless emeralds and hide them in a reservoir stocked with deadly piranha. I mean, of course they do, because that just makes total sense. Before we know it, suspicion and jealousy begins to consume the gang who all decide to steal the loot for themselves. Chaos ensues and soon the thieves are potential fish food.
Into the mix of blood and funky 1970s disco music we have the likes of Lee Majors and Karen Black, along with loads of irritatingly beautiful people sitting around and just being generally annoying.
Crikey, but this is boring stuff. Even the attack scenes are dull – not even in a laughable way – just a bit, well, meh. It does get more bloody as the film progresses but it is still a total snooze fest with no redeeming features.
It is interesting because clearly this film had a lot more money thrown at it than the likes of Piranha. There are a few big set-pieces, numerous explosions, but it is nowhere near as entertaining as Piranha which, for me, is still the ultimate example of how to do a B-movie.
The end scenes, where our heroes are stuck on a sinking boat, has a touch of Jaws about it, but believe me, that is where the comparison ends.
Near the end, Lee Majors and chief baddie James Franciscus have a fight in the water. Majors is attacked by hordes of piranha but somehow survives, and I can only assume his ample chest hair – which is frequently on display (see gratuitous shower scene for details) – somehow gives him extra protection.
To be fair, James Franciscus does some great death acting, shrieking whilst being attacked by hordes of piranha (which we do not actually see) whilst clutching what looks like his lunch box. (FYI, this is not a euphemism.)
Unfortunately, Killer Fish commits the cardinal sin of being just boring. And sorry for repeating myself, but go and watch Piranha from 1978.
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