Anoraks Assemble

They say the geek shall inherit the Earth. I’m counting on it.

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Just a random woman who loves horror, sci-fi, and anything a bit weird.

  • Ghostwatch – TV (1992)

    Ghostwatch was a British supernatural mockumentary first broadcast on BBC 1 on Halloween night of 1992.

    Presented as live – although actually part of the BBC’s Screen One anthology drama series – the show aimed to provide definitive proof of the paranormal. It was hosted by TV stalwart Michael Parkinson, a very familiar face to British viewers, and saw a fictitious investigation into supposed ghostly goings-on in a house in North London.

    The investigation was anchored by Sarah Greene – another well-known face on British TV – along with her husband, broadcaster Mike Smith, and Red Dwarf actor Craig Charles.

    The whole idea of the haunted house is clearly based on the famous Enfield Poltergeist case of the 1970s and in the Ghostwatch version we have a mother and her two daughters being terrorised by some unseen force, referred to as “Pipes”.

    At first everything seems fine, but gradually things starts to escalate until we reach the film’s shocking conclusion.

    The impact of Ghostwatch cannot be understated. It has never been shown again on UK TV and caused numerous complaints to the Broadcasting Standards Commission about how it left children traumatised. Using Sarah Greene – a very familiar face on children’s TV – perhaps led parents to believe the show would be suitable for their kids.

    How wrong they were.

    Having these familiar faces was a masterstroke, especially Michael Parkinson, who was host of a long-running chat show on the BBC, and one of TV’s most familiar faces. Also, this was the BBC and we (at the time of broadcast at least) trusted them. They would not try and fool the viewer in this way, would they?

    Watching Ghostwatch all these years later, it maybe looks a bit silly and unbelievable. Ghost hunting TV shows are so common these days, but 30 years ago there was no such thing. The last 10 / 15 minutes or so are genuinely creepy, and it is easy to see how a generation of children were scared witless.

    This is a highly original piece of work and it is such a shame that the controversy over Ghostwatch is more remembered than the actual drama itself.

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  • Dracula (1958)

    Dracula is a 1958 Gothic horror from Hammer, directed by Terence Fisher.

    Not only was it the first Hammer film to star Christopher Lee, but it was also the first vampire movie shot in colour.

    The story sees Jonathan Harker arrive at Dracula’s castle on the pretext of being the new librarian. Very quickly, we realise that Harker is in fact a vampire hunter and has Dracula in his sights.

    After Harker disappears, his friend, Dr. Van Helsing – played by the legend that is Peter Cushing – comes looking for him…..and then the fun really begins.

    It is hard to imagine the impact Dracula must have had on audiences back in 1958. From the opening titles with the splattering of blood, it is clear that this is something a bit different.

    It looks incredible, with its vibrant colours and healthy dose of blood and gore (at least compared to what audiences of the time were used to). And it is sexy, and I mean super sexy.

    Christopher Lee does not say much, but his first appearance at the top of the stairs is very dramatic. And his female victims look as though they might just be enjoying the attentions of the sexy count and his swishy cloak – all very daring for the time!

    There are a couple of nice emotional moments during the course of the film, which are very well done. When Harker realises he has been bitten and what fate awaits him, as he bravely writes his final diary entry. And when Van Helsing discover’s Harker’s lifeless body in the crypt and does what he has to do in order to free his friend from his curse.

    Christopher Lee is just do damn brilliant in this. He is so imposing and yet seems to almost glide everywhere. Frankly, he is terrifying.

    And Peter Cushing is just wonderful as the heroic Van Helsing, who turns into a proper action hero at the finale, when he forces the count into the sunlight and watches him disintegrate into dust.

    Dracula is such an important film, one which changed the image of vampires in popular culture. All these years later, it is still essential viewing.

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  • Children of the Stones – TV (1977)

    Children of the Stones is a seven-part British children’s drama, first broadcast on ITV in 1977.

    It tells the story of scientist Adam Brake (a pre-Blakes 7 Gareth Thomas), and his son Matthew, who arrive in the sleepy village of Milbury which is surrounded by a mysterious neolithic stone circle.

    Very quickly, they find that everything is not as it seems. The stones emanate a mysterious power which seems to hold the villagers captive, brainwashing them into perpetually (to almost quote REM), happy, smiling people who greet everybody with the same refrain.

    “Happy day!”

    As events spiral out of control, Adam and his son must face occurrences which challenge their beliefs about the very nature of time itself.

    It is difficult to know where to begin when trying to describe Children of the Stones. This is a truly exceptional drama and quite astounding that it was made specifically for children’s TV.

    It is genuinely disturbing in parts, from the opening titles, which are deeply creepy, to the incidental music, which is like nothing I have ever heard before. The weird choral chanting is repeated again and again and, in truly terrifying scenes, we see the possessed villagers all gather together, join hands, and sing this weird, haunting hymn, as though it is the most natural thing in the world for them to be doing.

    Amongst the chaos we have Gareth Thomas who is utterly convincing as scientist Adam, having his beliefs challenged more and more as the series progresses. Peter Demin is also very good as his son, Matthew. In fact, all the child acting in the show is of a particularly high standard.

    Iain Cuthbertson is wonderful as the sinister Hendrick, who seems to be the instigator of all the strange goings-on.

    Children of the Stones is pure folk horror, part The Wicker Man and part Village of the Damned. How it was thought to be suitable for children’s TV is anybody’s guess, but I am so glad it was.

    Don’t you just love the ’70s?!

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  • Late Night With the Devil (2023)

    Late Night With the Devil is a 2023 supernatural horror film, written and directed by Colin and Cameron Cairnes.

    The film is partly ‘found footage’ and tells the story of late night TV chat show host Jack Delroy, who, on Halloween 1977, invites an allegedly possessed girl onto his show in order to try and communicate with the entity. He hopes that this event will help boost his falling ratings.

    Things start to go wrong, gradually at first, which help to ratchet up the tension, until all hell is literally let loose.

    So firstly, the positives, and there are plenty.

    David Dastmalchian is just wonderful as Jack, the confused host who is still mourning the shocking death of his beloved wife. However, as the story unfolds, we start to see another side to him and his unending quest for good TV ratings.

    What is the price of fame and how much is he willing to pay?

    Also, Ingrid Torelli, who plays the possessed Lilly, is utterly terrifying. She has a somewhat otherworldly quality about her and the way she smiles when everyone else is losing their shit is actually quite disturbing.

    The films looks great, a really 1970s period piece, and when the scares start they are very memorable. The scene when June – the parapsychologist and Lilly’s guardian – first ‘talks’ to the entity is quite shocking, as are the moments of body horror involving Jack’s sidekick Gus, which should keep the gore-hounds happy.

    The film asks some interesting questions about the price of fame and exactly how far people will go to achieve success.

    For me, where the film falls down is the ending. It does fizzle out a little, as though the writers had this brilliant idea (and it really is a brilliant idea), but weren’t entirely sure how to end it.

    However I can live with that because Late Night With the Devil is very original and has much to recommend. The ending may be a bit lacklustre but it is a lot of fun getting there.

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  • Devil Dog: Hound of Hell (1978)

    Devil Dog: Hound of Hell is a 1978 made-for-TV horror directed by Curtis Harrington.

    The film sees Richard Crenna and Yvette Mimieux as married couple Mike and Betty Barry, who, along with their two annoying brats teenage children, when the family dog dies, end up inadvertently adopting the hound from hell. (Think Lucifer rather than Lassie)

    The family’s housekeeper Marie knows something is wrong, endlessly clutching her crucifix and looking worried. However, this action isn’t enough to protect Marie, who quickly dies in a mysterious house fire.

    For some reason, the dog – named Lucky – hates Richard Crenna’s Mike, and uses its Psycho Dog powers to try and compel Dad into sticking his hand into the blade of a lawnmower. But Crenna is made of strong stuff and Psycho Dog’s dastardly deeds fail miserably.

    The rest of the Barry family aren’t so strong, and pretty soon Bonnie and Charlie, along with their mother Betty, fall under Lucky’s spell. The kids become even more irritating whilst Betty turns into a sex-crazed maniac, frolicking naked in their neighbour’s pool after Mike comes home late from work. The poor fella only wanted his dinner.

    Dad eventually realises all is not well when he hears weird chanting from the attic and discovers his wife and kids have built a shrine to Lucky. I mean seriously, Dad, get a divorce and put the kids up for adoption.

    Eventually Mike decides enough is enough and visits an old woman who knows a lot about weird shit. She tells him some mumbo-jumbo about demons and Dad realises he has to visit Ecuador. (I’m not exactly sure why Ecuador, I might have drifted off at that moment).

    Eventually Crenna and Psycho Dog face off in a bonkers finale, with lots of snarling and baring of teeth (the dog, not Dad), thunder and lightning, then suddenly Psycho Dog is gone in a puff of smoke.

    This film is ridiculous but Richard Crenna is always a class act and I really did believe he was facing off against Psycho Dog from Hell.

    Very silly, quite good fun, but nothing to get too excited about.

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  • The Blair Witch Project (1999)

    The Blair Witch Project is a 1999 horror film, written and directed by Daniel Myrick and Eduardo Sanchez. It was something of a cultural phenomenon, redefining the whole ‘found footage’ genre and capitalising on a clever marketing campaign, which resulted in the film making an estimated $250 million at the box office. Without a doubt, it is the most famous ‘found footage’ film of all time.

    The basic plot sees three students, Heather, Michael and Josh, hike into the Appalachian Mountains to film a documentary about a local legend known as the Blair Witch.

    The first part of the film has a real documentary feel about it. We see the students interview local townspeople to hear their views of the so-called Blair Witch. It has a wonderful amateurish look (and I mean that in a good way), which lends strength to the idea that we are indeed watching a student film.

    And yet, I have such mixed feelings about the finished product.

    I mean, is it scary?

    Well yes, there are a few incredibly tense moments. The shaking of the tent, the strange and mysterious groans through the darkened forest, and Josh’s agonised cries. And the final shot of Mike, standing in the corner of the deserted building, facing the wall, is one to haunt the viewer’s dreams.

    The problem for me is, by the time we got to these moments I truly hated the characters so much I just did not care what happened to them. They are irritating beyond belief. And it is such a shame because it is a very, very clever film, highly original, and incredibly well put together.

    I had not watched The Blair Witch Project for quite a few years so decided to give it another go and see if my opinion had changed any. Sadly, I still think it is a case of style over substance. I think it is an example of highly creative and very original filmmaking, but ultimately, when the characters have little to no redeeming factors, it is difficult to care about their fates.

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  • The Night Stalker (1972)

    The Night Stalker is a 1972 made-for-TV movie, written by Richard Matheson and based on an unpublished story by Jeff Rice.

    The film follows reporter Carl Kolchak (the magnificent Darren McGavin) as he investigates a series of mysterious murders on the Las Vegas Strip, where all of the victims were found to be drained of blood.

    The victims’ bodies also have bite marks which, when examined, are found to contain human saliva. This revelation, along with the disappearance of blood stocks at the hospital, lead Kolchak to believe that a vampire is at work.

    Of course the powers that be do not believe him and warn him off, but Kolchak has a nose for a story and just cannot shake off the feeling that mysterious forces are at work. Eventually he is proved correct, but at what personal cost?

    When The Night Stalker was first broadcast in 1972 it set a record for the most-watched made-for-TV film, and it is easy to see why. It is just fabulous. This is mainly due to the character of Kolchak himself, a cynical, world-weary anti-hero made ridiculously likeable by Darren McGavin’s immense charm and charisma. We root for Kolchak and we want him to succeed.

    The story itself is an interesting one and the scenes along the Vegas Strip give it a sense of realism – it is very much in the here and now. Skorzeny, the villain, is genuinely frightening. He does not speak but hisses like a wild animal, and this factor, along with his make up, make him quite terrifying. There are moments when the camera focuses on his eyes, and it is actually quite disturbing and very effective.

    The Night Stalker, above all else, is fun, with a likeable lead character played by an actor with charm by the bucketload. It was followed by a sequel, The Night Strangler, and a 20-episode TV series, Kolchak: The Night Stalker.

    It also proved a major inspiration for The X-Files, with its ‘monster-of-the-week” format.

    The Night Stalker is an absolute gem and if you haven’t seen it, seek it out immediately.

    I don’t think you will be disappointed.

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  • The Nightmare Man (1981)

    The Nightmare Man is a four-part sci-fi / horror TV series which was first broadcast on BBC1 in 1981.

    It was based on the novel, “Child of Vodyanoi” by David Wiltshire and adapted for TV by Dr. Who legend Robert Holmes.

    Set on a small Scottish island (but actually filmed in Cornwall), a series of savage murders strike fear into the locals. After a strange craft is found on the beach, difficult questions are asked. Is it aliens, the Russians, or a secret military plot?

    Of could it somehow be a combination of all three?

    Mysterious deaths on a remote island are hardly a new thing – think of something like Island of Terror or Night of the Big Heat – but this is a little different in that it is rooted in a kind of realism of that era, with a Cold War paranoia and fear of Russia.

    Ex-army dentist Michael Gaffkin (the heroic James Warwick) is roped in to help. Along for the ride is his pharmacist girlfriend Fiona, played by the fabulous Celia Imrie.

    The special effects are absolutely fine. We see the monster’s actions from its point of view, which is actually quite effective. These scenes are accompanied by rather unpleasant slobbering noises and, disturbingly, inhuman laughter.

    Like so many BBC dramas of this era, it is low-key and slow-moving, but I do not mind this. It is also very tame in terms of what is shown on screen. I remember watching it in 1981 as an eight-year-old and absolutely loving it!

    The Nightmare Man comes from the era of The Omega Factor and The Mad Death, when the BBC took risks and showed us something a little ‘different’. I think the intervening years have been kind to the series and it holds up pretty well.

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  • The Omen (1976)

    The Omen is a 1976 supernatural horror film, written by David Seltzer and directed by Richard Donner.

    The film tells the story of an American diplomat, Robert Thorn, and his wife Katherine, who are living in Rome. She is pregnant and when she gives birth and the baby dies, the hospital chaplain convinces Robert to secretly adopt another baby whose mother died in childbirth. Robert agrees but does not tell the fragile Katherine, and they name him Damien.

    Fast-forward five years and Robert is now U.S. Ambassador to the United Kingdom. He and Katherine’s seemingly idyllic lifestyle is disrupted as, very slowly, they begin to realise that Damien is not all he seems.

    Eventually, Robert joins forces with photographer Keith Jennings (the wonderful David Warner), and they begin to uncover the shocking truth about just who, or what, Damien is.

    There was a real trend in the 1970s for supernatural horror, which was probably inspired by the likes of Rosemary’s Baby back in 1968, and it carried on with The Exorcist in 1973.

    But I think The Omen tops them all.

    For me, having Gregory Peck in the lead – an actual real-life movie legend – was the masterstroke. He plays it so serious and straight, I believe everything he says. Also, Lee Remick is so convincing as the ever-fearful Katherine. David Warner is just wonderful as Jennings, and Patrick Troughton is memorable, in a fairly brief but so important role, as Father Brennan, (complete with memorable death scene).

    Apart from Gregory Peck, the other piece of inspired casting is Billie Whitelaw who is just so completely pant-wettingly terrifying as Mrs. Baylock, the literal nanny from hell.

    The film spawned three sequels of varying quality, a prequel which I think is quite good, and a remake which is utterly ghastly.

    Why was it so popular?

    Maybe because it made the viewer question their beliefs, i.e. if the Devil exists then surely God must exist too.

    Or maybe because it’s got the coolest decapitation scene in movie history!

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  • The Day the Earth Caught Fire (1961)

    The Day the Earth Caught Fire is a 1961 British sci-fi disaster movie which tells the story of the United States and the Soviet Union simultaneously conducting nuclear bomb tests. The resulting explosions do something nasty to the Earth, resulting in floods, violent storms, sweltering heat, and an unexpected eclipse.

    On the case is drunken Fleet Street journalist Peter Stenning, played brilliantly by Edward Judd. He slowly uncovers the conspiracy, with the help of the wonderful Janet Munro as Jeannie, the sparky temp at the Met Office who is completely immune to Stenning’s charm. Leo McKern is fabulous as Bill Maguire, Stenning’s only real friend at the newspaper.

    Without a doubt, The Day the Earth Caught Fire is one of my all-time favourite films.

    The sense of realism in the newspaper office is off the scale, in no small part due to having real-life Daily Express editor Arthur Christiansen in the role of editor of the fictional newspaper. Also, the back and forth overlapping dialogue in the office feels so real. It is as though we are eavesdropping on this world.

    The story taps nicely into the Cold War paranoia of the time. 1961 saw the building of the Berlin Wall, so the whole East v. West was very much at the forefront in the minds of the public.

    The film is interspersed with real-life footage of floods and other natural disasters, which help to heighten the realism, and there are a number of quite memorable moments. The scenes of desolation in the world’s major cities are well done, as is Edward Judd walking slowly up an empty London street.

    As I’ve said already, the acting is excellent, with some wonderful supporting actors all the way down the cast list.

    It is also laugh out loud funny in parts. Val Guest and Wolf Mankowitz won the 1962 BAFTA for Best Film Screenplay, and I am not surprised in the slightest.

    This film is one of the best ever made, an absolute gem. If you haven’t seen it (what on Earth are you playing at?) then stop what you are doing and go watch it right away. I don’t think you will be disappointed.

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